I Follow Rivers
Dear reader,
Welcome to Letters & a Stoic.
I'm David Patrick Brady, a husband, a father of three, a generalist, and a Stoic. This is my first letter, and hopefully the beginning of a long correspondence on practical Stoic wisdom for the modern state of play.
By "the modern state of play", I'm referring to the current circumstances, conditions, and challenges we face. It's our zeitgeist—the defining spirit of our present moment with its unique tensions and opportunities.
And our modern state of play, at least where I'm from, has a tendency be information rich while, too often, being genuine human connection poor.
There is a vast river of “everything everywhere all of the time” information that we are immersed in and the longer we swim in it the harder it becomes to stay afloat.
On the plus side, if we become conscious that we're in a river and that we're swimming we have options.
When we get tired swimming, or better still, before that, we can angle for the shore and take a break to recover before we dive in again.
And we should because even if the river is bringing us somewhere we need to go, we won't get there if we get tired and sink.
The shore is where we can consciously connect with other people too. It's where we listen, feel, play, eat, laugh, love and sleep.
It's down time.
Time where we can process, think, reflect on the journey, look over the river, see other folks swim by and watch the boats meandering along.
Hold that thought.
There are boats.
Why am I still swimming?
Before I came across Stoicism I just kept swimming, and I was getting tired.
I found stoicism as I was struggling to get to the shore in the form of a book called “A guide to the good life” by William B Irvine.
It almost floated by but, with the thought “Good life sounds good” I grabbed it.
I sat by the bank I read it from cover to cover and as I got to the end I found myself with a compass in hand and everything got a little bit simpler.
With the compass I was able to pick a direction, and since then I've managed to construct a raft and an oar and I'm filling out my map with the help of others. My journal maps the dangers I've faced.
What’s written in there reminds me of those dangers and with it, I can choose to avoid them in the future.
I have a good sense of where I am in any given moment
And I know that I can choose to float, take a swim, berth my raft or row at any time.
And in this moment I'm choosing to row.
As well as giving me direction, Stoicism has become for me, a filter through which I can maintain agency over what I choose to let influence me and how I choose to respond.
Most of the time, this Stoic filter catches the informational chaff and keeps me conscious in the moment.
In the times my Stoic filter doesn’t engage I like remember a quote from the fictional Stoic “Robert McCall”, played by Denzel Washington in the Equalizer. (great movie)
”Progress, not perfection”
Making progress in anything virtuous is winning at life.
Ok, Every letter should have something for you.
You have agency over you. You can choose to create or adjust your own filter. What you focus on determines what you notice in the world around you and to some extent what you don’t notice.
Consider how, what's important to you in this moment filters your experiences. Your mind naturally seeks patterns that align with your current concerns and interests.
Very small example. We bought a car with seven seats recently. Before that I would never have looked twice at a seven seater. Now I see them everywhere. I'm sure they were there before but I was unaware.
This selective attention is not just about cars - it applies to everything in life. The beliefs, values and priorities you hold determine what you perceive or judge to be significant, good or bad.
You can backtrack this. By becoming aware of what you perceive or judge to be significant, good or bad you can question why and gain insight into your beliefs, values and the reasons why you prioritise the things you prioritise.
I hypothesize that, until you question your values and beliefs and accept them, they aren’t yours.
Most of what happens in reality isn’t within your control but how you interpret those happenings and how you choose to respond. That is in your control.
"Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens. Some things are up to us and some things are not up to us. Our opinions are up to us, and our impulses, desires, aversions—in short, whatever is our own doing. Our bodies are not up to us, nor are our possessions, our reputations, or our public offices, or, that is, whatever is not our own doing." - Epictetus
Remember. You have Agency.
Thank you for reading
With gratitude,
David
ps. Nothing to do with Stoicism but i picked the name of this letter because I remembered this dance track https://youtu.be/vZYbEL06lEU?si=3d7S9wmzeQzYwlgC